Living together, whether married or dating, is a challenge. Especially when it comes to the chores. Who does what? How do you divide housework with your partner?Here are 4 tips to remember.

Discuss chores with your partner.
photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash
Discuss chores with your partner.
photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

1. Talk To Your Partner

This tip is the most important in the list. Chores are not anybody’s favorite responsibility. In fact, they may be on the bottom of everybody’s desires. But, they have to be done. So, talk to your partner.

What do they not mind doing? What do they absolutely hate? What chores do you have the energy for? When you discuss chores with your partner, you create a space for active participation in responsibilities.

For example, I absolutely hate the dishes. Doing them sends me into pure exhaustion. But, my husband doesn’t mind this chore. So, he does them and I put them up.

We have figured out what works for us. But, this is only because we discussed how to divide our chores.

2. Remember 50/50 Isn’t Always Reality

So many people talk about marriage being 50/50. That is a lie. Some days, it is 60/40. Other days, it is 10/90. When one partner is sick, the other one must take on more chores. If one partner is working overtime, they may not have time for a normal chore workload. Remember this.

3. Revaluate Chores

Don't be afraid to re-evaluate chores with your partner.
Photo by Chloe Skinner
Don’t be afraid to re-evaluate chores with your partner.
Photo by Chloe Skinner

Before long, it is likely you will settle into a chore routine. It becomes an automatic concept: who will do what. In fact, you may not even think about it.

But re-evaluate the chore distribution occasionally.

Is one partner tired of cleaning the bathroom? Does one no longer have the energy to cook dinner every night? Do you need to create a new list of who will do what?

4. Use A Chore Wheel

Keep chores fun. Do you and your partner struggle with who will do what? Make chore division into a game.

Have you ever heard of a chore wheel? This will divide chores without disagreement. Write every chore on a section of a wheel. Then, you and your partner take turns spinning for your chore. Write that week’s chores down and voila!


Chore division doesn’t need to be a source of conflict in your relationship. It can strengthen it if done well. How do you divide chores with your partner?